Monday, April 21, 2003


I received this purportedly true account from a grad school mate of mine, now a professor at a fine institution of higher learning somewhere in Dixie. He tells of an enlightening exchange in a colleague’s class. For full disclosure, the friend who sent me this is a Calvinist Baptist; the professor in the account is believed to be a member of a church of Christ. Names have been suppressed to protect the guilty:

In an effort to prepare his students for their upcoming midterm exam, the professor decided to offer a study session last Wednesday. Knowing that many of his students were Baptists and that all Baptists know the surest way to heaven is by attending Wednesday night prayer meeting, he decided to offer the review session at 4:30 Wednesday afternoon. But when he gave the class the time for the meeting, a student stated that the Methodists had an important function at the Wesley Center that afternoon from 4:30 to 5:30.

The professor said, ‘Fine. We’ll move the review session to 5:40 so the Baptists can still go to prayer meeting. This way, we can please the Baptist gods and also please the Methodist gods.’

The Methodist student then raised his hand again and asked, "What do you mean? It’s all the same god.’ To which one of the Baptist students replied, ‘No He’s not!’

The Methodists then said, ‘How do you know he’s a HE?’

Baptist student: ‘That’s exactly what I mean.’

From the mouth of babes…

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